Virtual Worlds Should Eat Their Own Dog Food -and How Not To Get An Island.

Over the last few weeks, I've been doing a lot of research related to SecondLife. It has been very rewarding in many ways, but it has also uncovered some really strange things. No, I'm not talking about yiffy poseballs (which are strange to me, but not those who use them) - and I'm not talking about the boring griefers. I'm not even talking about the spamvertisers of SecondLife and all the people with questionable practices that should probably go back to their dead end jobs and leave the rest of us alone.

No, I'm talking about recursion. One of the things that I have been trying to do this week is pull out of the mainland because - honestly - there's just too much drama. Between unzoned land, overbidding at sim auctions and other things - the SecondLife mainland is in desperate need of an enema. After saying that a few times, you realize what you're standing in and you say... 'ok. Maybe I should leave until they do'. Besides, I have a life outside of SecondLife and I have work outside of SecondLife.

So I cash out some Lindens to buy an Island. I even have a name for the island. No, I don't want to bother with bidding on it - I just want to take my money, hand it to Linden Lab, and receive a product and related service. This should be a simple business transaction. So I go to the Island Information page. It says I should go to the Land Store. OK. So I find a space - I'm not very picky - and stick the 'space' into my cart. I'm excited now. It's a big step for me, but after all the drama on mainland - despite there being some interesting people - it's just too much drama. Contrary to what people might think, where you are located in SecondLife doesn't mean too awfully much when everything is a teleport away. Some will disagree. But do you really want a business in an area where the sim is loaded with people who aren't at your establishment? Sure, it's a high traffic area, but it isn't focused traffic.

I digress.

So I'm excited. This silly little cartesian coordinate that costs $1675 US is in my cart. I exhale while clicking to make sure I do so accurately. Kaboom (It *is* long, so skip past it):

NoMethodError in Buy#checkout

undefined method `empty?' for nil:NilClass

RAILS_ROOT: /local/www/secondlife.com/doc/apps/mapapps/../config/..
Application Trace | Framework Trace | Full Trace

#{RAILS_ROOT}/lib/vault.rb:138:in `check_record'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/app/controllers/application.rb:93:in `checking_billing_info'

#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/filters.rb:354:in `send'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/filters.rb:354:in `call_filters'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/filters.rb:350:in `each'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/filters.rb:350:in `call_filters'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/filters.rb:339:in `before_action'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/filters.rb:331:in `perform_action_without_benchmark'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/benchmarking.rb:69:in `perform_action_without_rescue'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/benchmarking.rb:69:in `measure'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/benchmarking.rb:69:in `perform_action_without_rescue'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/rescue.rb:82:in `perform_action'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/base.rb:369:in `send'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/base.rb:369:in `process_without_session_management_support'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/session_management.rb:116:in `process'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/railties/lib/dispatcher.rb:38:in `dispatch'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/railties/lib/fcgi_handler.rb:141:in `process_request'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/railties/lib/fcgi_handler.rb:53:in `process!'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/railties/lib/fcgi_handler.rb:52:in `each_cgi'
/usr/lib/ruby/1.8/fcgi.rb:597:in `each'
/usr/lib/ruby/1.8/fcgi.rb:597:in `each_cgi'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/railties/lib/fcgi_handler.rb:52:in `process!'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/railties/lib/fcgi_handler.rb:22:in `process!'
/local/www/secondlife.com/doc/apps/mapapps/dispatch.fcgi:26

#{RAILS_ROOT}/lib/vault.rb:138:in `check_record'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/app/controllers/application.rb:93:in `checking_billing_info'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/filters.rb:354:in `send'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/filters.rb:354:in `call_filters'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/filters.rb:350:in `each'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/filters.rb:350:in `call_filters'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/filters.rb:339:in `before_action'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/filters.rb:331:in `perform_action_without_benchmark'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/benchmarking.rb:69:in `perform_action_without_rescue'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/benchmarking.rb:69:in `measure'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/benchmarking.rb:69:in `perform_action_without_rescue'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/rescue.rb:82:in `perform_action'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/base.rb:369:in `send'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/base.rb:369:in `process_without_session_management_support'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/actionpack/lib/action_controller/session_management.rb:116:in `process'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/railties/lib/dispatcher.rb:38:in `dispatch'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/railties/lib/fcgi_handler.rb:141:in `process_request'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/railties/lib/fcgi_handler.rb:53:in `process!'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/railties/lib/fcgi_handler.rb:52:in `each_cgi'
/usr/lib/ruby/1.8/fcgi.rb:597:in `each'
/usr/lib/ruby/1.8/fcgi.rb:597:in `each_cgi'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/railties/lib/fcgi_handler.rb:52:in `process!'
#{RAILS_ROOT}/vendor/rails/railties/lib/fcgi_handler.rb:22:in `process!'
/local/www/secondlife.com/doc/apps/mapapps/dispatch.fcgi:26

Request

Parameters: None

Show session dump

---
:cart: !ruby/object:Cart
items:
- !ruby/object:SimReservation
attributes:
grid_y: 1082
rating:
status: not started
requested_estate_name:
expires_on:
requested_sim_name:
sim_template_id:
sim_reservation_order_id: 0
sim_paid_for: false
grid_x: 1030
agent_id: 636c5c95-4e9a-43d0-b7b0-395599d7954b
new_record: true
:y:
:x:
:agent_id: 636c5c95-4e9a-43d0-b7b0-395599d7954b
flash: !ruby/hash:ActionController::Flash::FlashHash {}

Response
Headers: {"cookie"=>[], "Cache-Control"=>"no-cache"}

This is a very long and obfuscated way of saying "It's broken!". But I'm using Seamonkey, so I figure I'll try Firefox. Same thing. Out of desperation (when else would I do this?), I fire up Internet Exploder. Same thing.

Talk about disappointed. Meanwhile, I can't reinvest cash because my limits are too low. So I'm stuck with this money sitting there eyeballing me, taunting me. It's useless to me. It isn't doing anything but earning Linden Lab interest. Apparently I'm in the business of interest free loans at browser-point. For Linden Lab, this is good business. For me, this is the Suck.

So I fire off an email or two, thinking that since I am supposed to be a concierge user (I pay enough in land tier) that I might get a response. 72 hours later, I have yet to get a written response. After 24 hours, I call - and since I am overseas and can't use the 877 number directly, I use Skype. Makes sense. So I call a few times. I listen to the Lindens tell me how to edit my appearance (what, is this a critique of my avatars?) and how to buy Lindens. But none of the messages said anything about how to actually talk to a human being. I keep trying. I leave a few messages. I leave one that states that the music and repetitive happy voices remind me of pre-internet 'Hold', but not in those words. I remained civil.

No one called back.

So I try the support phone number using Skype. Same result. The next day, I try again. Same things *except* at the very start, I am told 'Skype doesn't work with us. Sorry for the inconvenience'. Dear, dear. Well that explains why I could not get through but it amazes me that Linden Lab, which recently announced Voice Beta Live within SecondLife, could not cater to a VoIP solution for support. At least if I call India, I get a live person. So stage one - someone's not eating their own dogfood.

Stage 2 - armed with this newfound knowledge of the starving dog, I call internationally where I find out from an actual human being that (a) Concierge doesn't have an international number (sucks to be outside the US!), and (b) The people who raise Lindex ability are in a meeting and left no one around to handle those issues. OK. I'm assured that my limits will be raised before the end of the day.

Go ahead, ask me if that happened. Oh, stop. That was rhetorical.

So I fire off another email about the island (I had canceled my email order by email), and put a 24 hour expiration date on the order. If I hear from no one in 24 hours, I will resubmit the order... unless I get bored with the island ordering thing. Why? Too much drama. I copy Robin and Torley Linden.

I walk away from the computer for a while. I come back. Nothing. I'm not surprised. I actually expect to be ignored at this point - I suppose Linden Lab has my money anyway, why should they react?

But then it occurs to me. See, VoIP support for an international virtual world should be there. But let's step back. We're talking about a virtual world, right? People have offices in SecondLife where you can interact with someone else with a keyboard. Linden Lab runs SecondLife.

LindenLab has no offices in SecondLife. Linden Village? I have yet to see a Linden there. I did see Matthew Linden a few days ago; he was kind enough to remove a megaprim covering some land. I spoke with another Linden on Live Help who was nice enough. But when I go to Linden Village, I find everything BUT what I want to find out - and arbitrary pointers to parts of the website which haven't worked for me.

But then, let's take this a step further. Why can't I just go to Point X, Y on the map and 'BUY' the area? Good question, glad you're thinking - but it doesn't exist yet. So what would have to happen would be that there would be a map somewhere that had a representation of the non-functional landstore. You could... buy a prim that represents the island! And then some Linden would IM you or EVEN appear and chat with you about how long it would take!

But no. For some reason they don't have that. Now... that would be a good use of a virtual world's services to... provide for a virtual world's services. That sort of recursion would demonstrate that SecondLife believes in itself.

Of course, some might say that the landbots would buy all the prims... and Spamvertisers may cut up prims and put up spinning ads which include Linden Lab's trademark.

But what I really wonder about is how all these books talk about the 'good stuff' in SecondLife but fail to mention these sorts of things.