If you can't win, make the fellow ahead of you break the record.
-- Anonymous
The goal of Computer Science is to build something that will last at least until we've finished building it.
-- Anonymous
Most people are more comfortable with old problems than with new solutions.
-- Anonymous
We trained very hard, but it seemed that every time we were beginning to form into teams we would be reorganized. I was to learn in this life that we tend to meet any situation by reorganizing. And a wonderful method it can be for creating the illusion of progress while producing confusion, inefficiency, and demoralization.
-- Anonymous
Anything or anyone that influences the diameter of your knowledge further controls the circumference of your individual activity.
-- Anonymous
Ars est celare artem.
(Art is to hide art)
-- Anonymous
Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted counts.
-- Anonymous
We trained hard - but it seemed that every time we were beginning to form up into teams, we would be reorganized. I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganizing, and a wonderful method it can be for creating the illusion of progress while producing confusion, inefficiency, and demoralization.
-- Anonymous
If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging.
-- Anonymous
Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.
-- Anonymous
When you give a lesson in anger to a creature or a person, don't be surprised if they learn the lesson.
-- Anonymous
If you can't beat your computer at chess, try kickboxing.
-- Anonymous
All programmers are playwrights and all computers are lousy actors.
-- Anonymous
Politicians, like diapers, have to be changed frequently
-- Anonymous
A committee is a cul-de-sac down which ideas are lured and quietly strangled.
-- Anonymous
How does a project get to be one year late?
...One day at a time...
-- Anonymous
The difference between insane asylums and our schools is that in the insane asylum you have to show some improvement before you can get out
-- Anonymous
All you need to start an insane asylum is an empty room and the right type of people.
-- Anonymous
We the unwilling, working for the ungrateful, are doing the impossible.We have done so much, for so long, with so little, we are now qualified to do anything with nothing.
-- Anonymous
Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut, that held its ground.
-- Anonymous
Once you have glimpsed the world as it might be, it is impossible to live anymore complacent in the world as it is.
-- Anonymous
Responsibility does not only lie with the leaders of our countries or with those who have been appointed or elected to do a particular job. It lies with each of us individually. Peace, for example, starts within each one of us. When we have inner peace, we can be at peace with those around us.
-- Anonymous
A badly planned project will take three times longer than expected - a well planned project only twice as long as expected.
-- Anonymous
A change freeze is like the abominable snowman: it is a myth and would anyway melt when heat is applied.
-- Anonymous
A little risk management saves a lot of fan cleaning.
-- Anonymous
A minute saved at the start is just as effective as one saved at the end.
-- Anonymous
A problem shared is a buck passed.
-- Anonymous
A project ain't over until the fat cheque is cashed.
-- Anonymous
A project gets a year late one day at a time.
-- Anonymous
A project is one small step for the project sponsor, one giant leap for the project manager.
-- Anonymous
A two year project will take three years, a three year project will never finish
-- Anonymous
A user is somebody who tells you what they want the day you give them what they asked for.
-- Anonymous
A user will tell you anything you ask about, but nothing more.
-- Anonymous
A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on.
-- Anonymous
Activity is not achievement.
-- Anonymous
All project managers face problems on Monday mornings - good project managers are working on next Monday's problems.
-- Anonymous
Any project can be estimated accurately (once it's completed).
-- Anonymous
Anything that can be changed will be changed until there is no time left to change anything.
-- Anonymous
At the heart of every large project is a small project trying to get out.
-- Anonymous
Estimators do it in groups - bottom up and top down.
-- Anonymous
Everyone asks for a strong project manager - when they get him they don't want him.
-- Anonymous
Fast - cheap - good: you can have any two.
-- Anonymous
Feather and down are padding - changes and contingencies will be real events.
-- Anonymous
Finely chopped cabbage in mayonnaise - Coleslaw.
-- Anonymous
For a project manager overruns are as certain as death and taxes.
-- Anonymous
Furious activity does not necessarily equate to progress and is no substitute for understanding.
-- Anonymous
Good control reveals problems early - which only means you'll have longer to worry about them.
-- Anonymous
Good estimators aren't modest: if it's huge they say so.
-- Anonymous
Good project management is not so much knowing what to do and when, as knowing what excuses to give and when.
-- Anonymous
Good project managers admit mistakes: that's why you so rarely meet a good project manager.
-- Anonymous
Good project managers know when not to manage a project.
-- Anonymous
I know that you believe that you understand what you think I said but I am not sure you realise that what you heard is not what I meant.
-- Anonymous
If an IT project works the first time, it is wrong.
-- Anonymous
If at first you don't succeed, remove all evidence you ever tried.
-- Anonymous
If everything is going exactly to plan, something somewhere is going massively wrong.
-- Anonymous
If it can't possibly go wrong, it will - O'Malley's corollary to Murphy's law.
-- Anonymous
If it can go wrong it will - Murphy's law.
-- Anonymous
If it happens once it's ignorance, if it happens twice it's neglect, if it happens three times it's policy.
-- Anonymous
If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it probably is a duck.
-- Anonymous
If it wasn't for the 'last minute', nothing would get done.
-- Anonymous
If project content is allowed to change freely the rate of change will exceed the rate of progress.
-- Anonymous
If there is a 50% chance of something going wrong then 9 times out of 10 it will.
-- Anonymous
If there is anything to do, do it!
-- Anonymous
If there were no problem people there'd be no need for people who solve problems.
-- Anonymous
If you're 6 months late on a milestone due next week but really believe you can make it, you're a project manager.
-- Anonymous
If you can interpret project status data in several different ways, only the most painful interpretation will be correct.
-- Anonymous
If you can keep your head while all about you are losing theirs, you haven't understood the plan.
-- Anonymous
If you don't attack the risks, the risks will attack you.
-- Anonymous
If you don't know how to do a task, start it, then ten people who know less than you will tell you how to do it.
-- Anonymous
If you don't plan, it doesn't work. If you do plan, it doesn't work either. Why plan!
-- Anonymous
If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything.
-- Anonymous
If you don
-- Anonymous
If you fail to plan you are planning to fail.
-- Anonymous
If you have time to do it over again, you'll never get away with doing it right the first time.
-- Anonymous
It's not the hours that count, it's what you do in those hours.
-- Anonymous
It takes one woman nine months to have a baby. It cannot be done in one month by impregnating nine women (although it is more fun trying).
-- Anonymous
It will go wrong in the worst possible way - Sod's law.
-- Anonymous
Managing IT people is like herding cats.
-- Anonymous
Metrics are learned men's excuses.
-- Anonymous
Murphy, O'Malley, Sod and Parkinson are alive and well - and working on your project.
-- Anonymous
Never underestimate the ability of senior management to buy a bad idea and fail to buy a good idea.
-- Anonymous
No plan ever survived contact with the enemy.
-- Anonymous
No project has ever finished on time, within budget, to requirement - yours won't be the first to.
-- Anonymous
Nothing is impossible for the person who doesn't have to do it.
-- Anonymous
Of several possible interpretations of a communication, the least convenient is the correct one.
-- Anonymous
Overtime is a figment of the na
-- Anonymous
People under pressure do not think faster.
-- Anonymous
Planning is an unnatural process, doing something is much more fun.
-- Anonymous
Planning without action is futile, action without planning is fatal.
-- Anonymous
Powerful project managers don't solve problems, they get rid of them.
-- Anonymous
Projects happen in two ways: a) Planned and then executed or b) Executed, stopped, planned and then executed.
-- Anonymous
Quantitative project management is for predicting cost and schedule overruns well in advance.
-- Anonymous
Some projects finish on time in spite of project management best practices.
-- Anonymous
Some things that don't count are counted, many things that count aren't counted.
-- Anonymous
The bitterness of poor quality last long after the sweetness of making a date is forgotten.
-- Anonymous
The conditions attached to a promise are forgotten, only the promise is remembered.
-- Anonymous
The first 90% of a project takes 90% of the time the last 10% takes the other 90%.
-- Anonymous
The first myth of management is that it exists.
-- Anonymous
The more desperate the situation the more optimistic the situatee.
-- Anonymous
The more ridiculous the deadline the more money will be wasted trying to meet it.
-- Anonymous
The more you plan the luckier you get.
-- Anonymous
The most successful project managers have perfected the skill of being comfortable being uncomfortable.
-- Anonymous
The most valuable and least used phrase in a project manager's vocabulary is I don't know.
-- Anonymous
The most valuable and least used word in a project manager's vocabulary is NO.
-- Anonymous
The nice thing about not planning is that failure comes as a complete surprise rather than being preceded by a period of worry and depression.
-- Anonymous
The person who says it will take the longest and cost the most is the only one with a clue how to do the job.
-- Anonymous
The project would not have been started if the truth had been told about the cost and timescale.
-- Anonymous
The same work under the same conditions will be estimated differently by ten different estimators or by one estimator at ten different times.
-- Anonymous
The sooner you begin coding the later you finish.
-- Anonymous
The sooner you get behind schedule, the more time you have to make it up.
-- Anonymous
There's never enough time to do it right first time but there's always enough time to go back and do it again.
-- Anonymous
There are no good project managers - only lucky ones.
-- Anonymous
There is no such thing as scope creep, only scope gallop.
-- Anonymous
There is such a thing as an unrealistic timescale.
-- Anonymous
To estimate a project, work out how long it would take one person to do it then multiply that by the number of people on the project.
-- Anonymous
Too few people on a project can't solve the problems - too many create more problems than they solve.
-- Anonymous
Warning: dates in the calendar are closer than you think.
-- Anonymous
What is not on paper has not been said.
-- Anonymous
What you don't know hurts you.
-- Anonymous
When all's said and done a lot more is said than done.
-- Anonymous
When the weight of the project paperwork equals the weight of the project itself, the project can be considered complete.
-- Anonymous
Work expands to fill the time available for its completion - Parkinson's law.
-- Anonymous
You can build a reputation on what you're going to do.
-- Anonymous
You can con a sucker into committing to an impossible deadline, but you cannot con him into meeting it.
-- Anonymous
If you are ashamed to stand by your colors, you had better seek another flag.
-- Anonymous
Don't think you're on the right road just because it
-- Anonymous
Before you can break out of prison, you must first realize you're locked up.
-- Anonymous
If you keep doing things like you've always done them, what you'll get is what you've already got.
-- Anonymous
The fastest draw is when the sword never leaves the scabbard,
The strongest way to block, is never to provoke a blow,
And the cleanest cut is the one withheld.
-- Anonymous
Advertisers constantly invent cures to which there is no disease.
-- Anonymous
If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into committees. That'll do them in.
-- Anonymous
I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
-- Anonymous
Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.
-- Anonymous
I have my own little world, but it's okay - they know me here.
-- Anonymous
Microsoft is not the answer. Microsoft is the question. NO (or Linux) is the answer.
-- Anonymous
We are Microsoft. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile.
-- Anonymous
Once you have glimpsed the world as it might be, it is impossible to live anymore complacent in the world as it is.
-- Anonymous
If you live your dreams, you never have to wake up.
-- Anonymous
Do not repair another man's fence until you have seen to your own.
-- Anonymous
If our brains were simple enough to be understood; we'd be so simple that we couldn't.
-- Anonymous
If you are keeping your head while others around you are losing theirs, perhaps you've misunderstood the whole situation.
-- Anonymous
So many people tiptoe through life, so carefully, to arrive, safely, at death.
-- Anonymous
A terrorist is someone with a bomb, but without an air force.
-- Anonymous
Actions speak louder than words, but isn't writing an action?
-- Anonymous
Any program that runs right is obsolete.
-- Anonymous
Anyone who thinks this is black and white has not read up on the subject.
-- Anonymous
Anything devoid of change is a figment of ones imagination, and therefore subject to be forgotten.
-- Anonymous
At the end of the game, the pawn and the king go back in the same box.
-- Anonymous
Be not afraid of growing slowly, be only afraid of standing still
-- Anonymous
Columbus was lost.
-- Anonymous
Consulting: If you're not part of the solution, there's money to be made by prolonging the problem.
-- Anonymous
Decisions are made by those who show up.
-- Anonymous
Egotist, n. Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.
-- Anonymous
For the common man can do nothing: The fact he undertakes the task makes him uncommon.
-- Anonymous
Half of the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important.
-- Anonymous
I code, therefore I am.
-- Anonymous
I have an idea! .... Oh, wait...no, that was just a tumor.
-- Anonymous
If you can't appreciate it, you don't deserve it.
-- Anonymous
In most instances, all an argument proves is that two people are present.
-- Anonymous
It is not ignorance that is the problem, but the illusion of knowledge.
-- Anonymous
Karma spares no one.
-- Anonymous
Life is a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% fatality rate.
-- Anonymous
Never mistake knowledge for wisdom. One helps you make a living and the other helps you make a life.
-- Anonymous
Reality is where Illusion is at it's strongest.
-- Anonymous
Right or Wrong is always dependent on the context.
-- Anonymous
The best defense against logic is ignorance.
-- Anonymous
The candle that burns twice as bright burns half as long.
-- Anonymous
The death of three civilians and a dog causes uproar and sadness. The death of 20,000 soldiers causes dissatisfaction.
-- Anonymous
The goal of science is to build better mousetraps, the goal of nature is to build better mice.
-- Anonymous
The things you regret the most are the risks you didnt take.
-- Anonymous
The vision of a champion is someone who is bent over, drenched in sweat, at the point of exhaustion when no one else is watching.
-- Anonymous
Think of the Web as a big bathroom wall. And everyone has a marker.
-- Anonymous
Those who suppress freedom always do so in the name of law and order.
-- Anonymous
Whenever anyone tells me "Life is hard," I say, "Compared to what?"
-- Anonymous
Where patience fails, force prevails.
-- Anonymous
You can
-- Anonymous
Use of advanced messaging technology does not imply an endorsement of western industrial civilization.
-- Anonymous
"How many of your immediate family have been kidnapped by aliens more than once?"
"None."
"Good, just once each. That means the new tag system is working..."
-- Anonymous
The Zen Master is visiting New York City from Tibet. He goes up to a hot-dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything."
The hot dog vendor fixes a hot dog and hands it to the Zen Master, who pays with a $20 bill.
The vendor puts the bill in the cash box and closes it. "Where's my change?" asks the Zen Master.
The vendor responds, "Change must come from within."
-- Anonymous
If you aren't part of the solution then you are part of the precipitate.
-- Anonymous
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
-- Anonymous
Always use tasteful words. You may have to eat them.
-- Anonymous
One of the world's greatest magicians, a past master at the art of prestidigitation and an expert on card tricks was giving a lecture.
After the lecture a young and very enthusiastic amateur came up and talked to the master. He told him how honored he was to meet the older magician.
Trying to impress the great man with his standing even though just an amateur, he bragged that he knew 100 card tricks. How many tricks, the amateur asked, did the master know?
"Oh, about seven," answered the master.
The difference is that the amateur did the same trick each time and thought it was different, the master knew there was no difference.
-- Anonymous
"Buddha sat down before a wall. When he stood up he was enlightenment embodied."
"You dare to compare yourself to the Buddha?"
"No. A wall."
-- Anonymous
Nihil curo de ista tua stulta superstitione.
I'm not interested in your dopey religious cult.
-- Anonymous
Recedite, plebes! Gero rem imperialem!
Stand aside plebians! I am on imperial business.
-- Anonymous
Stultus est sicut stultus facit.
Stupid is as stupid does.
-- Anonymous
Non plaudite. Modo pecuniam jacite
Don't applaud. Just throw money.
-- Anonymous
Real Programmers arrive at work in time for lunch.
-- Anonymous
Real Programmers never work 9 to 5. If they are around at 9 AM, it's because they were up all night.
-- Anonymous
Who wants to be known for butt-prints in the sands of time?
-- Anonymous
The point is that money enables exchange in a society in which trust is low or absent, exchange between strangers. It is a form of balanced exchange, which requires an immediate return for anything given. In contrast, in a society with high trust, generalised exchange is possible, in which there is ongoing give and take, and an assumption of long term, unmeasured balance, but no immediate return on a transaction.
-- Anonymous
Its the Internet. The men are men, the women are men, and the children are federal agents.
-- Anonymous

Technorati Tags: 




Post new comment